Cheers To Wine!
I enjoy a glass of wine each night for its health benefits. The other glasses are for my witty comebacks and flawless dance moves. Cathy CantuI'm a mom of 3 teens living in TN. I write about the chaos...
View ArticleMama Don’t Like to Freeze in the Piggly Wiggly
I’m so glad it’s fall. During brutal Memphis summers, we southern girls start glistening as soon as we step outside. For my anniversary in August, I was gettin’ all gussied-up, with big hair...
View ArticleShampoo Promises a Steamy Shower
Yesterday my teenage daughters asked me for more shampoo and conditioner, and I said I’d pick some up at the grocery since I was on my way there. They rolled their eyes and sighed because they “needed”...
View ArticlePre-marital Sex?
Why are Baptists against pre-marital sex? Because it could lead to dancing. (JK – I have lots of Baptist friends. Hey, we’re in the Bible belt!) Cathy CantuI'm a mom of 3 teens living in TN. I write...
View ArticleHello, I’m the Frazzled Mom, and I’m a Slacker
I stopped making New Year’s Resolutions because I always end up breaking them. I really need some self-discipline, but that means I’d get a reputation for efficiency and the Snarky Housewives of the...
View ArticleYou Wanna Bring the Voodoo Dolls?
“This year our theme is “Underbelly of New Orleans! Raise your hand if you want to bring the voodoo dolls and sacrifice the live chicken!” —- And that’s why I’m no longer welcome to head up the...
View ArticleSporting Beer Goggles? Step Away From the Karaoke Machine
Do not ever give in to the temptation to sing karaoke in a bar if you look around and think to yourself how unbelievably “hot” everyone is. Cathy CantuI'm a mom of 3 teens living in TN. I write about...
View ArticleAnother Birthday, Another Boat-load of Stupid
My birthday was this week, and things are sagging—my body AND brain. You’d think our brains would improve since they get fuller with time. Not so. Time has sabotaged my ability to clearly...
View ArticleAnd That’s Why . . . .
And That’s Why . . . . “Take her down, Missy Rae! She ain’t nothin’ but a beat down skank! And so’s her mama!” And that’s why I’m no longer welcome at my daughter’s soccer games. momlogic.com...
View ArticleWarning for First Dates
Do NOT disclose on a first date that you are a “Trekkie” and that the Klingon Carpaccio at Starfleet conventions has really gone downhill since Gene Roddenberry died. Cathy CantuI'm a mom of 3 teens...
View ArticleSolving World Problems One Riblet Basket At a Time
This time of year many men get together with friends, building bromances watching basketball. Unlike women, men in groups engage in competitions to determine their male superiority over the losers in...
View ArticleDon’t Blame It All On Estrogen
Reliable sources from Ripley’s Believe It Or Not! state that women speak three times more words per day than men. In groups, women speak in a “stream of consciousness” manner about infinite topics....
View ArticleAcceptance Speech For Sports Mom of the Year
Ladies and Gentlemen, coaches, trainers, orthopedists, x-ray technicians, the guys who created the Maps app on my phone, and my therapist, Kendall Jackson: I humbly thank you for this honor. Thank you...
View ArticleHard-Core Soccer Moms Judge Kids By This . . .
From us hard-core soccer moms: Some may question our philosophy. We’re not exactly proud to say that we judge a ten-year-old’s character by her speed and footwork, but hey, life’s not fair. Cathy...
View ArticleGirl’s Night Out
On any given Girl’s Night Out, females speak in a “stream of consciousness” manner about infinite topics. The chemicals responsible for this are estrogen and sometimes tequilaphrine. Cathy CantuI'm a...
View Article20 Ways Cats Are Like Toddlers
1. Watch you go to the bathroom 2. Philosophy: what’s mine is mine, what’s yours is mine, that which you may want in the future is mine. 3. You do not own them. 4. Must have dirty paws all over...
View ArticleAnother Anti-aging Cream
My friend spent $300 on Anti-aging cream made from cat placentas. Her skin looks great, but she goes bat-crazy when the vacuum cleaner is turned on. Cathy CantuI'm a mom of 3 teens living in TN. I...
View ArticleSiri’s Programmers Had a Cuervo Party
Siri’s nerdy, smug programmers are boring, and they’re hurting sales. So Apple’s mischievous Marketing Dept. sneaked Cuervo into the programmers’ water cooler. Now, Siri can’t be tamed. Average Joe to...
View ArticleWife Swap and a Passionate Encounter With Doritos
I love reality shows, and one of my favorites is Wife Swap. Every episode two polar opposite families agree to swap wives for two weeks. http://www.campaignbrief.com/2011/12/post-119.html The first...
View ArticleCaution: Serious Disorder Leads to Wearing Coconut Bra
I was a room mom extraordinaire. For Halloween, other moms brought cupcakes with a Milano-cookie tombstone sticking out of the top. Pu-leeeze. I brought a masterpiece with a lighted skull and glowing...
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